ey to buy popularity with, I'd rather have one good heavy frigate than all the jack-o-lantern popularity in the world to go to war with; good strong heavy cannon thunder, Sangrado, that's the best thing to meet John Bull with, none of your paltry gun Boats, for harbor defence, the breath of a Seventy-four will blow them all to the devil. Ah, we've philosophized too much, and what does it all amount to? Philosophy never warmed a cold limb, or filled a gaunt belly. I like something more practical; the best way to reason with an unreasonable being, is to meet him with sword in one hand and a club in the other, so that if you cannot run him through, you may knock him down.

Well, Sangrado, give my love to my Lady, tell her not to be too intimate with Jacques-I shall keep a sharp look out for them-Tell them I'll be ready-Tell them I'm wide awake, Uncle Sam will never be caught napping-Bring me a glass of Whiskey boy. When common sense points her finger, fools run the wrong way. A plague on all cowards! Bring me a glass of Whiskey !

CHAPTER IV.

HOUSEHOLD AFFAIRS-SITUATION OF THE STRONG BOXSINGULAR EXPEDIENT TO REPLENISH IT-CONFERENCE BETWEEN THE CHIEF STEWARD AND UNCLE SAM'S WIFE -ARGUMENT BETWEEN MADAM SAM AND TOM BOSTON.

SANGRADO whose office and duty it was to feel of the pulse of Uncle Sam, and carry messages and cards, immediately repaired to the mansion house, and delivered the result of his embassy, where he found the Chief Steward in close conference with Uncle Sam's Lady, in the great drawing room.-Madam appeared to be a little out of humor at the hearing some part of Uncle Sam's remarks, and the subject of conversation when the Squire entered being chiefly domestic, her Ladyship remarked that the great dining table which, originally consisted of thirteen legs, was out of order, notwithstanding it had been repaired at different times, it did not stand level on the floor. That even now when the servants were bringing on and carrying off dishes, an accidental blow would frequently give it such a tilt, as to shake off the dishes and spill the gravy on the guests. And altho’ five additional legs had been added to it, at different times, the vicious propensity of the thing, still continued. They had discovered indeed, during the stewardship of George, that a large foreign Dog, of the Genevan breed, had got under the table, and gave it such a tilt as nearly to upset it, and broke many of the dishes. But this was not the cause of its frequent jostling, for the dog had been taken into the kitchen and fed and

had grown to such a size that, he could not in his present state, contract his limbs so as to get under the table without much trouble. The Chief Steward was for having it altered, in toto, and instead of eighteen legs, have but one. Or bring it to a kind of tripod in imitation of John Bulls dining table. Her Ladyship objected strongly to this, for she said she knew her husbands disposition so well that she was sure he would knock out the brains of any Cabinet Maker who should attempt such an alteration. Jacques replied that in his opinion the amendment was practicable, for let Uncle Sam only be sent off into the army it could be done in a trice while he was absent, and that if once done he was sure he would be pleased with it. But Madam declared that she knew his humor so well, that he would never eat off of it again, that Uncle Sam had always imputed the fault to the inequalities in the floor, and that he would never submit to any alteration in the Table, for she had frequently heard him boast of the number of its supporters, and complain bitterly of the unequal surface of the foundation on which it rested. But upon the entrance of the squire this desultory conversation, yielded to matters of higher moment.

War with Bull had been determined on, and the mind of Uncle Sam had been wrought up in some measure to the occasion. Sangrado, to be sure put the best face on that part of the message which related to the pulse of his master, because he knew very well what suited Jacques, and her Ladyship.

The subject of the Strong box came now under consideration. The Large Genevan Cur, above mentioned had been trained and employed to watch it. And so `extremely docile was he, during the period of his puppy

hood, that his masters taught him to bark once a year in token of his fidelity and success in guarding the Strong box. And some went so far as even to affirm that the Cur gave as many distinct yelps, as there were dollars in the Strong box. It was found on examination that more Cash would be wanted than could be gathered in the ordinary way. It was settled between the Chief Steward and Madam, that Uncle Sam should have a large bundle of Notes struck off at interest which he should sign at his leisure. These should bear interest, and should be considered in all respects, as shadowing forth so much real Cash, as they imputed by their denomination respectively; and should as usual promise to pay, at some given future period. This they both agreed, -would meet all the purposes of so much real treasure, But for form's sake, it was judged best to have the matter debated before the whole family. The matter being laid before the household her Ladyship introduced the subject, and stated the advantages of the scheme. She expatiated at length, on the facility with which this kind of money could be carried and transported. She maintained that being compressible into a small body, it was less liable than any other money to the depredation of thieves and free booters. That Gold and Silver were ponderous, and no man could carry any quantity about him without creating suspicion, holding out a temptation to the crafty, designing and knavish. That a man might carry any given quantity of these notes about him, walk as light as a puppet and appear as tho' he was not worth a stiver. That no one could possibly object to receive the paper, Uncle Sam's respousibility being so well known; consequently any tender law would be totally unnecessary, for like well-brew'd ale, it would work

itself into circulation and credit. And this species of Currency, added her Ladyship, accords well with the genius of the family government; as these notes may be very pertinently termed the representatives of specie, so our government is often called representative. A general nod of assent, was expressed by the Noddles who sat around the room at the conclusion of this harrangue of her Ladyship, but Tom Boston, who happened to be present, and was in the habit of being heard on such occasions, was observed to look rather sour, while Madam was delivering her speech, and, when her Ladyship had finished, rose and made a few observations in reply.

"I imagine, said he that this mode of supplying the Strong box, will not be found, on experiment, to have all the advantages, which this plausible theory seems to promise; nay this mode of creating money, if not properly managed, may produce great inconvenience, and mischief. It will be received for a while, perhaps, without much difficulty; but it is idle to think of giving it a permanent currency to any considerable amount, upon the mere general reputation of Uncle Sam's responsibility. For altho' this kind of paper has frequently been made to answer the most ordinary and important purposes of Coin, it never can establish itself permanently without having the precious Metals to back it, and for the basis on which it rests. It is not sufficient that a man is worth the full amount, or double, or treble for which he gives his paper. For all property excepting the precious metals, is subject to change, and liable from a thousand causes beyond the control of the most discerning, to lessen, or depreciate. Neither is it sufficient that a man is able to take up his paper, and give a solid consideration, but the fund which constitutes his means,